Pain
by GabbyAbby
Summary: She had put up with him for too long, loved him for too long, suffered for way too long. All she needed was to be loved, even if it wasn't by him. HouCam, WilCam, WilCud
1. Chapter 1 Vicodin

**Pain**

**A/N:** I do not own **'House M.D.'** apparently my job just doesn't pay me enough so that I can buy it.

**Chapter 1 Vicodin **

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The white pills were in a pile on his desk.

He held one between his thumb and index finger, studying it under florescent lighting of his office.

This small white pill was supposed to relieve him of pain, create a euphoria that made him feel nothing. It was suppose to relax his body and mind.

That's what they had told him when they first began prescribing the pill for him.

He was in chronic pain, and he knew that there were other ways he could deal with it; he knew that the drug was slowly killing him.

That bet with Cuddy had proved just how much.

He remembered Cameron's worried glance when Jimmy let slip about his little arrangement.

She had tried to defend him, he suffered from pain, that he needed the pills.

She didn't think like that anymore, he made sure of that.

He could try other methods; he could go through all that crap.

But it was so much easier to swallow those little white pills, they worked fast and the pain would disappear for those few moments. When he felt that high, when nothing truly mattered, where he could think that nothing had ever happened to his leg and he was just a normal stubborn jerk.

He threw the pill against the adjourning door to his office. Cameron looked up from her paperwork. She had stayed late as always to finish it because she knew he wouldn't and the boys were just as lazy.

He looked at her when she rolled her eyes and went back to the files. The ring on her finger shinned with the light.

He looked down at the pile of pills,

his little pile of escapes.

It's true that his leg didn't hurt as it had before. Not since the shooting.

He was supposed to cut down on the intake. To be perfectly honest, he was supposed to have stop using them, months ago.

He picked up another pill; he stared at it as he twirled it between his fingers.

Why couldn't it take away heartache as well?

His leg was only throbbing slightly; it was the pain in his chest that drove him insane.

It was for the pain where his heart should be that he dry swallowed the pill.

Because he had let go of the only good thing in his life,

he had let her slip between his fingers to the man he called his best friend.

They would be happy together; he thought as he closed his eyes and leaned back in his chair. The funny thing was that Jimmy would probably cheat on her in a year and at that time she would hurt as much as he was now.

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**Think I should continue it? **

**Please review. **

**GabbyAbby**


	2. Chapter 2 Cameron's Flashback

**Pain**

**A/N:** As you probably know… I don't own them….YET! (But an evil plot has been hatched-muwahaha)

The parts in _italic_ are flashbacks, just that there is no confusion.

**Chapter 2 Cameron's Flashbacks**

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The ring was beautiful.

A small white gold band with a beautiful set of five small diamonds that surrounded a slightly larger blue sapphire.

She was happy; at least that was what she tried to convince herself.

Wilson was a good person, he was caring, nice, he worried, and he loved her.

And she needed to be loved. She was just to tired of being hurt.

--------------------------------

_She sat alone in the conference room, tears streaming down her face, she tried to brush them away with the sleeve of her crisp white lab coat. The sleeve already soaked with her tears and smudged make-up. _

_He didn't have to treat her like that; all she had done was tell him about her feelings. _

_And he treated her like a piece of trash, something that hardly mattered. _

_He threw her feelings back at her face with disgust and anger. _

_She heard the glass door open and turned so she was in front of the window, whipping angrily at her tears. _

"_Cameron?" a gentle voice said her name as a question, as if asking her if she was all right with out really saying the words out loud._

"_Hey Wilson" she turned around, eyes bloodshot and a little make-up smudged around her eyes, her nose a little red and a trace of a hiccup on her voice. "What are you doing here?" her voice gentle as she tried to calm down her soft, almost soundless sobs. _

"_Had a patient that was just brought in, Liver cancer." He looked tired but yet he smiled at her. He probably knew it was because of his best friend that the beautiful young immunologist sat in an empty room crying. _

"_Oh" she was silent again, tugging at her sleeves as a nervous habit he noticed._

_He was silent as well, and then he took a few steeps forward till he was only a foot away from her._

"_You want to go for dinner?" _

_----------------------------------_

She heard him as he threw the pill against the glass door and looked up. He was annoyed at something. He had been like that since he woke up from his latest surgery.

Or maybe it was since the day Wilson announced their engagement.

She couldn't remember why she had said yes.

She rolled her eyes at Houseshe didn't really need his crap today. She had put up with him for too long, loved him for too long, suffered for way too long.

-----------------------------------------

_Wilson knew she wasn't in love with him. Yet he sat in front of her, her hand held within his own._

_He asked her to move in with him. He asked with such hope that it hurt her. _

_Because she didn't want to let his hopes get so high, when did they get so high anyway? They had been dating for a few months, maybe more than a few months. She hadn't really been paying attention. _

_He was waiting for her answer and she gave him a weak smile. _

_She couldn't answer him. _

_A week after that all her things were in his barely furnished apartment. _

_He snuggled closer to her, his bare chest against her back. He kissed the top of her head "I love you," he whispered against her ear as sleep took over him. She felt tears burn her eyes. _

_She slipped out of bed and got dressed quietly. Her watch told her it was a little after two. _

_She locked the door behind her and headed to the hospital, to sit in his room reading while he was still in that drug-induced coma. _

_She sat there till morning, her neck and back hurt. She needed to get some sleep._

"_When did you get up?" his voice with a trace of laughter behind it, came from the doorway._

"_Morning James" she put down the book and pretended to check his vitals. _

"_Come on let's go get breakfast." he put his arms around her shoulders and guided her towards the door. _

_She looked back at the man who lay asleep in the hospital bed, a bandage on his neck, morphine drip and a banana bag connected to his arms. _

_She felt like she should go back to were she sat most of the night, she should watch over him till he woke up. _

_But she let herself be guided out of the room, into the arms of someone else. _

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She picked up the papers she was going over and walked to his office "These need your signature," she said simply and dumped the papers on his desk, scattering the pills over the desk and floor.

She ignored the fact that the pills littered his office and turned to leave.

"Cameron," he whispered, she turned around, arms crossed over her chest. But her eyes betrayed her, they were so sad.

"Catch"

She caught the white pill in her hand and gave him a quizzical look.

"You'll end up needing it more than I do" after that he turned to the paperwork.

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_The question shouldn't have surprised hershe knew it was coming. _

_In her mind she had already said 'no', and the word was about to slip her lips when what House had said to her crossed her mind. _

"_Would you give it up already! Fuck Cameron get it through your head. I. Don't. Like. You."_

_And the hope in Wilson's eyes once again drove her to do it. She smiled a shy sad smile as he slipped the ring onto her finger. She realized she never truly gave him a straight answer; he just mistook her smiles as a 'yes'. _

_He kissed her hard on the lips. She almost pushed him away. _

_It wasn't that he was a bad kisser; it was just that he wasn't the one she wanted to be kissing. _

_Wilson ran around the hospital, telling anyone who would listen. _

_House had been the first one and she had been inside his office at the moment. _

_She could swear she saw jealousy and a familiar sadness cross his blue eyes. _

-----------------------------------------

At home, 'James' home, she couldn't quite think of it as hers yet, she flipped through the channels, knees tucked in under her, a glass of wine in her hand.

She could barely hear James' voice as he talked about the wedding.

He was saying something about where to have it because he was Jewish and she an Atheist.

She looked down at the ring, it was beautiful. She stared down at the sapphire. Blue. All that crossed her mind were deep icy-blue eyes. Should a ring given by one-man remind her so much of another?

James would make her happy; he would care about her, be nice to her, worry about her and love her. Maybe she wouldn't hurt anymore. He would be a great and caring husband.

She had to convince herself of that, she thought, as she turned to give him a smile.

**--------------------------**

**Well apparently everyone wanted me to continue, and I have to go with the popular vote, don't you think?**

**So… did you like it? **

**Well thanks so much for 'quigles'** **for giving me the idea of what to write in this chapter, and also of being the beta for the chapter! **

**I'm working on the next chapter and it _should_ be done soon. **

**Well please review! **

_**GabbyAbby**_


	3. Chapter 3 Wilson's Part

**Pain**

**GabbyAbby: So all the little details for the plan are still being worked on… But it should be up and running in… a few years? **

**quigles: Anyone feel up to robbing the bank and then being sedated and having their free will removed? No? How about if we brain wash ya, then it really wouldn't be your fault. Except you would be sedated and you would have to take the fall for robbing the bank. But it is all part of the evil plan and it is all for the good of House. Come on, any takers?**

**GabbyAbby: Whatever she said. Hey she is the one who fixed up this chapter as well as the last, so if it weren't for her you wouldn't be reading this right now…. By the way, any takers in the offer? Come on we really need someone who would do that, it's all part of the plan. **

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**Chapter 3 Wilson's Part **

_He had been jealous of House. _

_Jealous that the beautiful immunologist could love him so much that she was oblivious to all the attention she got from not only him, but also a good part of the male staff at PPTH. _

_Their first date, like almost all others they had, was because she was upset. _

_He knew she wasn't looking for a relationship. Much less a relationship with the best friend of the man she was in love with. _

_But he had to give it a try. _

_He had to make her see that he was better for her than his old stubborn best friend. _

_And yet he wouldn't let himself notice the way her eyes lit up when House was in the room. Or even when he was brought up in a conversation. The way she protected him and gave reason behind all the crazy things he insisted on doing. _

_He knew that their relationship only existed because she was just so tired of House that she needed someone who loved her. _

_It was never part of the equation that she needed to love him back. _

_But he was doing everything he could to make her love him, because she was different. _

_But maybe, just maybe, she was different because she didn't love him. As House had once told him, she needs to "fix" people and he needs to love people. Maybe their mutual needs could somehow form a lasting bond? _

_He may not be as damaged as House but he needed, and what he needed he thought Allison could provide. He needed to love, and she needed to be loved and by letting him love her she was making his life better. _

_He only hoped she would realize this._

Wilson took a deep breath and tried to shake the thoughts out of his mind. He needed to concentrate on what he was doing.

He looked up from the scattered papers at the table to ask her a question.

She was seated in front of the TV, a glass of wine half full held by her slim fingers. Cinnamon-chocolate hair fell across her shoulders in curls.

He knew she wasn't paying attention. As she nodded her head to the question he asked, he could feel the tears begin to burn his eyes.

She smiled at him; a smile that almost made his heart beat faster.

It would have accomplished such a goal if he hadn't known she was thinking about someone else.

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_He didn't know why he had asked House for his help to pick Allison's engagement ring. _

_Of course the fact that House didn't know who they were going to pick a ring for did help in convincing him. Maybe that and a promise of a Reuben sandwich everyday for a month. _

"_Come on Jimmy, you won't be able to keep it a secret." House had said as he looked outside the car window. _

_James was silent, a smile on his lips. _

_When they had reached the jewelry store, one that he had found a few weeks earlier, he had finally managed to get House to shut up by saying he wouldn't buy him the promised Reuben if he did not stop asking that same question. _

"_House will you at least try to help?" he asked almost an hour later. His friend was seated on a somewhat uncomfortable chair, legs crossed at his ankles. _

_He looked as if he was thinking for a moment "Why bother? The marriage is only going to last for what... a year?" he shrugged and went back to playing his GameBoy. _

_James gave him a nasty glare and took the gaming device away from his hand as a form of persuasion. _

"_FINE!" he almost yelled, sounding very much like an annoyed five-year-old. _

"_Now how can I help if I have no idea who the woman is… it is a woman right?" House looked at his friend with a suspicious glance at the last part of the question. _

"_No House it isn't. It's this really absolutely sexy doctor with great hair and a kick ass accent" he sighed and rolled his eyes as he tried to hold back a laugh. He was glad to have his friend back. Just a few weeks before he still lay on a hospital bed in a drug induced coma. At least it had worked and he could now walk with out much help or pain. _

_House gave him the same look and took a few steeps away, this time Wilson did laugh. _

"_Just think of someone you like and what would look good on her.," he pleaded as he looked over a few rings, they just didn't seem to fit with Cameron. _

_It was a few minutes later House spoke again, this time he pointed at something behind the glass case. _

_The ring was truly beautiful. A thin white gold band was completed with a set of five small diamonds around a slightly larger deep blue sapphire. _

_It screamed Allison Cameron. _

_And right at that moment James had a feeling that he wasn't the only one who longed to have her. _

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"House I have a favor to ask."

"Not interested." he sat on his chair, eyes glued to the ceiling. Anger, hurt, and confusion laced through his voice.

Wilson walked closer to his friend, and pressed his back against the glass wall.

"Please" he pleaded.

House looked away from the ceiling; James noticed that his eyes were just as sad as Allison's.

"What do you want Jimmy?" House asked, as he tried to look past his friend.

"I want you to be my Best Man." He expected House to say something snappy, along the lines of 'again?'

However, no such words left his mouth, he was silent.

His answer surprised his best friend.

"If Allison is okay with it." House turned away after that, placed his headphones in his ears and turned up the volume on his iPod.

Wilson sighed and ran his fingers through his brown hair. He never wanted to see his best friend so unhappy, with such sadness in his eyes.

But he also didn't want to give up the one person they both cared so much about.

**----------------------------- **

**And that was that. **

**Took me a while to come up with the idea for this chapter, I must have written it, deleted everything, then re-written it about five times before it finally ended up in this.**

_**GabbyAbby**_


	4. Chapter 4 Three Different Views

**Pain**

**A/N:** It makes me sad that no one was up for the offer… come on, please? You would just be blamed for a bank robbery… no? I guess its back to the drawing board. And I still don't own them. Shame.

**-----------------------------------**

**Chapter 4 Three Different Views**

**---------------_Lisa Cuddy_---------------**

House had been strangely on time for the last month. He had done all his clinic hours, a few more than he truly did need. And took the cases she handed him without question.

Lisa knew she should be pleased, or at least content that he was finally coming around.

She would be in such a delight if it weren't for the look in his deep blue eyes.

She had never seen the diagnostician in such despair, not even after he had woken up to find the muscles in his right leg gone.

Then he had been angry and frustrated. And when Stacy left he became bitingly sarcastic.

But now, he was just sad. And truthfully she didn't know how to deal with a sad House.

The why she had called Dr. Allison Cameron into her office.

James had been her first choice, but after a few words with him she picked up on the fact that something had happened between the two friends. She thought it was none of her business why they weren't talking, but it seemed she was wrong.

"Dr. Cameron, you wouldn't happen to know why House isn't being his delightful self, would you?" Cuddy asked and tried not to notice the tears in the young Doctor's eyes.

There was a strange silence around them, and it began making Lisa slightly uncomfortable.

"You haven't heard it then," Cameron whispered eyes glued to the floor.

Cuddy fought the urge to ask what but instead she was quiet and let the young Doctor speak.

"Wilson and I…" she shook her head, tried to find the right way of saying it.

"He asked… I mean…" Cameron took a deep breath and Lisa started to get a little annoyed at the young Immunologist. "We're engaged." she finally said, and Lisa felt nothing but astonishment and a strange sense of sadness.

"Hey James." Lisa said, tried to hide the hint of tears in her voice.

"Cuddy! Wasn't expecting you." he smiled and got up from his chair, the paperwork forgotten.

"I heard the news… So it's the fourth time, huh?" Lisa tried to smile, she tried to be happy.

But when she saw his puppy-brown eyes light up, she wanted to cry. It was then that she realized that for some time now she had been thinking of him as more than a friend.

**-----0-----0-----0_Eric Foreman_0-----0-----0-----**

It wasn't much of a surprise when Wilson announced the big news.

What did surprise him was that it was because of the 'big news' from boy wonder that his boss had become so… tolerable!

In the years he had worked under Gregory House he had seen his boss be a jerk, sarcastic, and be annoying beyond anything else.

But he had never seen him be so quiet, so lost and depressed.

He should be happy and running around like the maniac that he really was, now that he could run. But he would actually spend most of his time down at the clinic.

Surprisingly he was actually working and not watching an episode of his favorite soap.

Foreman always thought that Cameron and Wilson would be a perfect couple. The two were just so much alike.

He could never understand why she loved House. She was a 'stuffed animal made by grandma' as House had once put it and he was the biggest jerk on the planet.

Wilson was nice and gentle. He cared.

He cared probably as much as Cameron.

In Eric's mind it should always have been House and Cuddy because they were always on each other's ass about something or another. They were both strong people who knew what they wanted.

He laughed gently, he couldn't have been more wrong. He noticed as the four became miserable.

Cameron was going to marry boy wonder Oncologist because he _would_, and did, love her. Wilson proposed because he found Allison beautiful and needy. She needed to be loved.

House gave up Cameron because… well Foreman was still trying to figure that out.

And Cuddy just didn't want to admit that she could have fallen in love.

Eric took a sip from his coffee and watched as Chase broke the tip of yet another pencil in his attempts to finish the crossword puzzle.

"Get a pen, I'm tired of hearing you sharpening the stupid pencils," Foreman said as he read over an article on the magazine he held.

"How can she be marring Wilson?" Chase was aggravated, Foreman noticed.

Foreman had to control himself not to smile.

**---------------_Robert Chase_---------------**

He had to admit, Wilson was a much better choice than House.

He just wished that she had considered him.

It was true that she was goddamn gorgeous and on top of him that night, but he knew that she was high. He should have done something to stop her advances and to help her with what she was dealing with.

He didn't because in his mind it would be the only chance he would ever have with her.

He had been right. He could still remember how her body felt against his, so small and perfect. He closed his eyes and sighed.

Chase was sure Cameron knew about his feelings for her, just as he was sure that she didn't feel anything for him besides friendship.

But yet he was still frustrated that she was getting married.

She had been so much in love with House that she had completely ignored his feelings.

And in the blink of an eye she switched to Wilson.

She never even gave him a chance to show that he truly did love her.

He wasn't just after her as a sexual being.

He shook his head; he dropped his stuff by the door of his apartment and run a hand through his hair.

God he was so stupid, if he had only left that night.

Then maybe she would be marrying him in two months and not Wilson.

As Robert Chase lay down to sleep, he stared up into the plain ceiling.

Wilson would be good to her. He knew that.

But he also knew that Wilson couldn't make her happy.

Because even he knew that the person her heart truly belonged to was their now very passive boss.

Robert wondered how Wilson managed to ignore that, how he went about his day making wedding plans and how he laid down next to her at night, knowing what her truest feelings were.

He prayed that night, prayed that Cameron knew what she was doing and could find peace with her decisions, prayed that Wilson would continue to love her and always do what was best for her, and finally he prayed for House,

because no soul should be in as much torment as his was. House had never said anything to him, but one look into his wounded eyes and the truth was revealed.

**-----------------------------**

**I just wanted to show a little about how the other main characters feel about the wedding. The next chapter will actually be part one of the wedding, there are going to be two or three parts of what goes on during the wedding. **

**Sorry about making Cuddy be in love with Wilson, there is a reason behind it! And Chase, well I just knew he was still in love with Cameron. **

_**GabbyAbby**_


	5. Chapter 5 Wedding Part I

**Pain **

**A/N:** Não tenho, e provavelmente nunca terei, direitos ao show **'House M.D.'** ou de algum de seus personagens. Now try and figure that out!

**A/N:** Thank you so much for all the reviews!

**Chapter 5 Wedding Part 1–Cameron**

She was nervous, but not in the way a bride should be nervous.

She wasn't nervous about getting married in less than two hours, she was nervous because _he_ would be there.

Her hair was half up with the remaining falling over her shoulders in perfect curls; her make-up was kept to a minimal just so it would accentuate her best features.

She had to admit her dress was beautiful, with thin straps and the body hugged her chest and hips perfectly before flowing out just a bit around her legs.

Her mother was so proud, tears springing from her eyes at every look she gave her eldest daughter. Her father couldn't believe his little Ally was getting married.

And her two younger brothers and sister had nothing to say but compliment her beauty.

A part of the reason she had more than half an hour ago asked then politely to leave her alone with her thoughts.

The second part was a part that wanted to run. Run away as far as she could from all the lies.

Her fingers absently traced the patterns made from small pearls around her bodice.

She wanted nothing more then at that moment to rip the dress off and run from this place, run from the pain she was sure was coming. And specially run from him.

Because she knew that when it came to the time she would just look into those endless blue orbs and instead of the much awaited 'I do' she wound say 'I can't'.

With her head buried deep in her hands she let herself cry.

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She should have known it would be hard to run in the dress, but she wasn't thinking clearly, if she was thinking at all.

She needed to get away, just for a moment; she needed to forget what was going to happen in the next hour.

She hadn't planned on telling anyone what she was doing. But the hard body she hit made her once more break down into tears.

Her heart almost stopped when she saw nothing but blue.

"Cameron" his voice was soft as he looked at her his hands on her shoulder to steady her, too soft to belong to him. His eyes were sad, not the 'I hate the world' sort of sad they always contained, rather a much deeper sadness that made her want to do everything to take it away.

He moved one of his hands from her shoulder and ever so gently wiped her tears. "You look too beautiful to be crying," he said, instantly regretting his words as he watched more tears fall.

A part of her mind yelled at her to get away from him, that he would bring nothing but more pain and confusion.

But the stronger part told her that she needed to have his lips against hers, she needed to escape the reality of the world.

"Cameron?" he said her name like a question because he was probably not sure of what was going on in her mind.

He was so close that his sent was intoxicating, leaving her head swimming in silly thoughts.

"Allison," her name sounded so much better passing his lips.

He kissed her first, or maybe she was the one who initiated the kiss.

It didn't matter, because the kiss proved to be everything she ever dreamed it would be.

His lips were warm and dominating against hers.

His arms wrapped around her waist and she couldn't help but to melt against him, to want to feel what was under the perfectly pressed black tux.

Her fingers were in his hair and his teeth nipped ever so gently on her lips. She moaned.

And she forgot why she was wearing such an uncomfortable and beautiful dress, why her hair was pinned up and why the make-up ran down her cheeks.

All she could concentrate on was his lips and the way they fit so well against hers, how her fingers moved up and down his muscular chest, and how his arms wrapped around her.

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**Yeah it's short, but what can I do? If I continue it will just defeat the whole purpose of having multiple parts! **

**Please review and tell me what you think! **

_**GabbyAbby. **_


	6. Chapter 6 Wedding Part II

**Pain**

**A/N:** Damn it… still don't own them.

**Chapter 6 Wedding Part II-House**

He got up that morning with the knowledge that it would be the worse day of his life.

The notion to just stay in his home and ignore the celebrations that would start in the next few hours crossed his mind more than once as he limped to the bathroom.

It wasn't fair.

Wilson could have anyone. Did he not notice that Cuddy followed him around like a sick puppy?

Cameron was his. He had always been attracted to her.

But she was so young, so delicate, so … everything he wasn't.

Maybe she would be happy with Wilson.

He convinced himself of that for the whole drive to the small little hotel they were holding the wedding at.

He would have probably believed the sentence had she not come running down the hallway, white dress and perfect curls.

"Cameron" he was surprised at how soft his voice was.

And he knew he had lost the job at convincing himself when he saw tear stricken eyes.

She looked gorgeous, no more than that. There was absolutely no word he knew of that could describe how she looked.

And his eyes couldn't leave her face, his heart couldn't help but to yearn for her and his brain couldn't stop telling him that it was wrong.

His hand gently from her shoulder, were they had been to steady her after she bumped into him, to wipe away the tears that ran painfully down her cheek.

"You look to beautiful to be crying" and it was true. But he wished he could take them back as soon as more tears soaked her cheeks.

She was having some sort of internal battle, and he could almost see it playing in her tearful eyes.

"Cameron?" his voice gentle, careful.

He leaned closer to her, her rapid breathing bathed his lips and he was almost lost then.

He needed to kiss her, needed to have her small body against his.

"Allison" her name left his lips like a need when he really wanted it to come out in a way that would make her pull him out of this trance.

But her eyes, just how needy they looked how they wanted him, it was enough to break down every barrier he had ever built.

And her lips were so soft under his.

For a second, or maybe it was less than that, she didn't respond and he thought he had done something stupid. It wouldn't have been the first time.

But she responded with as much need as his.

She was so small in his arms and he pulled her closer, crushed her small warm body against his as his lips devoured her, tried to take away all the pain she felt, all the confusion.

Her fingers were in his hair, they pulled his face closer to hers and his teeth nipped softly on hers, and he smiled when she moaned.

It was her body that drove him to do it; he would stick by that no matter what anyone said.

She was warm, small, perfect, delicate, and gorgeous.

He couldn't, wouldn't, let anyone else take her away from him.

Even his best friend.

He didn't remember them running through halls filled with faces he didn't recognize, didn't remember how he could drive home with her so beautiful and needy next to him.

But they were inside his apartment, and for a moment he kicked himself for not cleaning the place and he hugged her pulled her body as close to him as possible, his nose was buried in her neck.

It took in that sent that had driven him crazy for so many months.

"I'm sorry" he whispered and he didn't know why

She was quiet and he knew he should have asked before he stole her away from a man who could probably make her happier than he ever could.

Wilson was caring, loving… he was whole.

And he was a drug addicted who hated almost everyone. He was broken.

"I'm not" her voice was no louder than a whisper, so soft he only heard it because of how close they were.

In the back of his mind somewhere he knew his friend was devastated.

He knew he would never forgive him.

And he felt even worse, because he didn't care.

**------------------**

**Much drama to come soon! **

**Of course Wilson is going to be pissed off and things will lead to things and someone might get beat up. **

**Now I'm not telling you who! **

**Sorry took so long to update. School really sucks, well just the way-to-much-homework-that-will-drive-you-insane part mostly though. **

**I'll try to update this soon, but if I can't I'm very sorry. **

**It will probably be because the huge mountain of homework has pilled up so high and then fallen on top of me causing me to be crushed under its weight. **

**Well please review! I know it's probably not the greatest chapter… But I'll work harder on the next one!**

_**GabbyAbby**_


	7. Chapter 7 Wedding Part III

**Pain**

**A/N: **and yet I still not own it.

**Wedding Part III**

**------------------------------**

It was probably a sign that he just wasn't supposed to get married.

That was what God wanted to tell him. Why else would he just have to walk into his best friend and soon-to-be-wife, kissing in a way that it didn't matter that they were in the middle of a hallway with people who knew that she was suppose get married to someone that wasn't the man she was in a lip lock with.

It was even worse because he knew he was kidding himself when he thought she loved him. That she would give up all the feelings she had for the jerk his best friend was, he should have known better

So he was supposed to be alone after all.

For months he thought it was different, that he could change her feelings. Because she had agreed to move in with him, had smiled when he asked her to marry him.

He should have realized then that she never answered him with a yes.

For God's sake! She had slipped from his bed every night at some point, to read, to watch TV, to go visit House at the hospital. She would sleep on an uncomfortable chair for hours because she was closer to the man that was such an enigma to all that knew him.

He was seated on the bar that was suppose to cater to his wedding, the one he had to announce was canceled on the part that the bride had just left with another man.

He was on his fifth cup vodka when Cuddy sat next to him, with a jaw-dropping velvet dark blue dress with a V that went down so much that it left too little and too much to the imagination.

"So why did you think this wouldn't have happened?" She asked, and he knew she was trying to sound as if she wasn't all that happy that Cameron had left him.

"I alluded myself" he tipped back the glass and closed his eyes.

"You know James. It would have happened at some point" he felt her eyes on him, as if they had been searching for something in his face.

It was only when he felt her hand brush against his cheeks that he opened his eyes to see she was no more than a few inches in front of him.

"She's still in love with him" he heard himself say as those pale blue eyes stared into his.

"Yeah" she whispered, and he knew she was too close to him. Her breath, a small puff of warm air, so close to his lips and dark brown curls fell on front of the cleavage he felt his eyes run over it for a moment.

"You don't seem surprised that this ended up happening" in his head he knew he should have sounded angrier than his voice came out to be.

"It wasn't a secret that I didn't want this wedding to happen"

"Well I had other things on my mind" he smiled, knowing that he shouldn't.

It's when she smiled that he noticed that his hands on were her hips, fingers making patterns across the velvet material that was even softer then he originally thought.

"Why were you jealous of Allison anyway?" he asked, though he already probably knew the answer.

"When I hired you James, I swore you were smarter than that" she smiled, and he knew she was too close and that he shouldn't allow any of this to happen. But she was too attractive and too forward and too tempting.

"I still have the two tickets for Rome" he whispered, hoped his voice showed the invitation he was sharing.

"Rome, huh?"

**---------------------------------**

**Don't worry, I might kill myself if I ever take this long to update again. **

**I just didn't know what I wanted to put in this chapter and after a while I just kind of gave up. I know I probably could have done this chapter more justice but well, this is this. **

**Please Review!! **

_**GabbyAbby**_


	8. Chapter 8 Tired

**Pain**

**A/N: **I don't want to repeat what has already been stated.

**A/N: **Thanks so much for me beta **xyber116**, with out her there would be many mistakes in this chapter.

**----------------------------------**

**Chapter 8 Tired**

She was tired.

Tired of questions and rumors that were everywhere she went. Tired of the headaches and repeated words.

She wanted to simply be left alone to enjoy her life. What went on in her life was her problem and the people who worked with her should have absolutely no say about her choices.

But life sometimes doesn't work as planned and eyes turned her way every time she walked down a hallway or entered a room. As the nurses apparently forgot that their job was to watch over patients and not rumor about the doctors. Probably, though, it was the rumoring that made their work a little bit more interesting.

House of course ignored them, as he did even before all this had happened. He had known it would be coming. He had informed her that her name would be the most spoken one in the hospital for the next few months, until something even bigger than walking out on your groom on your wedding day, to be with his best friend happened. It was a hard thing to beat after all.

But she wasn't like him, she couldn't just ignore everything and it was driving her insane.

Especially when she knew that he would be returning to work in less than a week.

She was happy for Wilson, because it was also no secret that he had left for their honeymoon with Lisa Cuddy.

Why else would both be missing for the same amount of time the honeymoon was scheduled for?

And the weight of everything just kept growing because her friendship was ruined. Not one friendship, but two. The two most important people House had would probably never want to speak to him again because she couldn't help her feelings.

Who was she to do this? They had known each other for probably longer than she had been a doctor and she felt it was her right to break that up.

It was no wonder that she was distracted. That at moments of the day she would go missing only be found on the roof bawling her eyes out.

And it shouldn't have surprised House when he found the still red and tender straight lines cut on her forearm.

But it had and when she woke up to find him glaring at her she wanted to disappear, because she should have known better than to do that.

He told her it wasn't her fault. He could have prevented all of this if he had only told her how he felt.

It was his fault for thinking that she wouldn't want another person. He was selfish because he didn't think that his denial for her feelings would cause her so much pain.

He pushed her against the headboard and made her promise never to do that again. Cutting wasn't the answer to the problem. They would figure something out when the time came.

Besides, he was pretty sure that Wilson was just about over it. After all he did have Cuddy's 'fun bags' to keep him from thinking of all that had happened.

She had laughed, pressed her forehead against his shoulder and laughed, because he was the only person who could make a joke when times should be so serious.

On the day the plane landed he waited for his friend on the airport. According to him, if James was going to harm him in any physical way it would be better if he did it inside a place were there were at least security that would pull then apart.

She had gone with him, but when the people started to come off the plane she chose to stay behind for a moment and watch what was going to happen. She needed to come up with what she was going to say and do.

The situation was delicate and needed to be handled with care.

"Hey, Jimmy!" She heard him say and pulled her eyes from the floor and to the familiar faces that had just appeared in the middle of the crowd.

"So, apparently she doesn't kill after mating. Good to know."

James shook his head then looked at his best friend "I don't think it's time for jokes House."

"Well, I had to try."

Cameron took a deep breath, tried to calm herself down, and make her feet move.

"Dr. Cameron," Cuddy's voice was even, careful. Her heels clicked on the floor as she made her way towards the younger doctor with the always present air of confidence she carried.

"Cuddy…" she started but stopped as soon as the older doctor shook her head.

"I think we should discuss this away from the crazy couple," she nodded her head in direction of House and Wilson who apparently were going to start the physical harm any second.

Allison looked back and forth for a moment before nodding and allowing herself to be guided away from the two men and follow the beautiful woman in front of her.

**--------------------------**

**Sorry took so long, I just didn't know in what direction to take this. **

**Please review!**

_**GabbyAbby**_


	9. Chapter 9 Not Done Yet

**Pain**

**A/N: **Is there a use for the repetition of this statement?

**---------------------------------**

**Chapter 9 Not Done Yet**

Cameron stared at the cup in front of her, swishing it every few seconds and watching as the clear liquid swerved along with the olive placed inside.

Cuddy had guided them inside a bar called 'Black Cat' located just a few miles from PPTH, and both had already been offered more drinks than they could probably handle.

A tactic that the men staring at them were probably very sad they wouldn't be able to accomplish.

They escaped the black eyes and fists to talk. Of course Cameron knew they have more than enough tot talk about, but yet, neither had even made an attempt to begin a conversation.

Cuddy also seemed to be as lost as to why they were seated in the back both of the bar staring at everything but the person in front of them.

Until of course Cameron's phone started to glide across the table, buzzing and the tiny screen telling her with its neon blue light that House wanted to talk to her.

She looked up at Cuddy and nibbled gently on her lower lip (something that was clearly a nervous habit of hers).

She had to almost tell herself not to let her fingers shake as she reached for her black MotoRazr V3xx.

"Dead yet?" she asked as soon as she flipped the phone open and smiled, because she needed to have some familiarity, from the stuffy air that had settled around her.

"Almost" she heard him laugh "Jimmy can give a punch, I'll tell you that"

She was pretty sure she heard James in the background somewhere laugh then hiss in pain "Oh you baby, their just stitches!" House told his friend before turning back to the phone call.

"You need someone to pick you up I'm guessing?" Cameron asked, looking up at Cuddy who seemed to try to listen in to the conversation.

"If Cuddy hasn't eaten you yet"

"No, I'm sorry you caught us just as she was taking her skirt off"

There was a slight pause and Cuddy pressed the back of her hand against her lips to stop herself from laughing.

"Why do I always miss the good stuff?"

"As long as I don't" Cameron smiled and took one last swing from her drink "We'll be there soon" she closed the phone before he could ask for the details, even if he knew that she was kidding.

"If House hadn't up show before the wedding…Would you have married James?" Cuddy asked as they got into the car, which threw Cameron a little off. Not because it was a hard question to answer, but because they hadn't shared more than a syllable since leaving the airport.

"House actually bumped into me when I started to run away" she answered truthfully, not looking at the beautiful woman behind the wheel.

"You didn't love James" it wasn't a question, and Cameron nodded.

"Then why…?"

"I just ... I needed someone…_Something_ to get my mind away from House, and Wilson offered himself. He told me I could pretend it was House and not him" She took in a deep breath and bit her bottom lip once more "Things just feel together and before I even noticed we were living together and I couldn't remember agreeing to it. I just needed to please him, pretend that I was happy because _he_ needed to know that I wouldn't wait forever for him to notice that I was alive. I would pretend that it was a prank me and Wilson were in, but then he would just…he would do something and I had to see that it was true, that we were together and that he was attracted to me." Cameron closed her eyes and tugged gently at her hair, because she couldn't seem to be able to sit still an share this with someone.

"It was out of nowhere that I realized we were getting married, a day I was working late and House threw a pill against the glass, I couldn't believe it. I mean we were getting married when I hadn't even started to feel comfortable to be living together" Cameron blushed, she wasn't sure if it was because she had just basically told someone with the power of firing her that she had used her now boyfriend or because Cuddy seemed to be such an untouchable force that it actually scared her.

They were quiet again, staring aimlessly into the road and passing cars. Pretending that it was a normal day and that everything would be finally alright.

It was a lie, down to every point you could look at it, but if they wanted to they could believe that it wasn't, that everything would eventually turn out to be just as they had dreamed.

But dreams rarely come true, that it was made clear when Cuddy parked her car on the usual spot, her name quietly gleaming under the light of the parking lot and day old snow.

"You knew I .." Cuddy started, unable to finish the sentence because even she didn't want to admit it was true.

"No" it was a truthful answer, she hadn't known. She hadn't taken the time to notice something that was so clearly on her face because she hadn't taken enough time to care about other things but herself and her messed up love life.

They walked silently, because it was just too hard to break the tension that had gripped them, tied them together in a bond that was too unwelcomed.

Heel clicked on concrete to remind them that behind the closed glass doors life would change.

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**I am sorry for the delay in updating this, I am sadly once more with out a beta and anyone who would volunteer would become the love of my life at the moment. **

**So sorry for any mistakes made here I'll have them fixed as soon as I find someone who is willing to go under the torture of reading all this stories before they are posted up…Come on any takers? Please?? I'm begging here!! **

_**GabbyAbby**_


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